Bascom Branch Library

It’s true. The Bascom Branch Library is really great. And big. And on the outside, it screams NEW! INNOVATIVE! LIBRARY!

Seriously, every library is basically designed in pretty much the same structure on the outside so you can see from down the block the shiny beacon of Beauty that is THE LIBRARY.

Inside though, the Bascom Library isn’t as imaginative and fun as the others are. (Which explains the lack of photos)

It’s straight to business. Colors are fine. But no stuffed dragon or tree sculpture here! No sir!

Pretty computers YES.
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Needless to say I didn’t fall in love with this place. But I do find the quiet room interesting.

There’s no difficult door to maneuver or find. It’s like one big glass window slapped the other one out and made a parallel gap between the two so you can just WALK THROUGH LIKE A BOSS (without having to make a fool of yourself wondering if it goes in or out -EDENVALE!!-)
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Anyways, yea. Did my homework here. Not really, just fell asleep on the couch before I even read one page of SIDDHARTHA.

Don’t worry. I saw 2 old people sleeping while I was touring the library. I’m not alone.

After leaving the library, I was in a pretty conflicted mood and therefore spent the next hour roaming downtown San Jose. Again.
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Not even sure if you can see my expression but it stands for “bleh.”

But, that was then. You can’t stay too long in the red zone.

This is going to sound so cheesy, but bear with me.

Only YOU are in charge of where to steer your bike. U-turn it, drive it madly down the road, turn left or right. There’s many ways to bike.
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As for me, this summer I’ve been driving my bike all sorts of wonky ways and will probably continue in that manner. Life is fun that way.

And eventually, when it’s time to park your bike, lock it up safely and walk away in style!

The time comes soon! I’m off to Alviso Branch Library in less than 12 hours!

Alum Rock Branch Library

Basically, I just didn’t like the ambiance of Latino america today so I left it for the next place on the list: Alum Rock Branch. So what if I have to bike 5 miles? Library closes at 8 anyways. I have time.

So I head off to the land past downtown and I-680. There I find a more densely Latino and black population. Don’t mistake me for being prejudiced, but after being checked out by a middle aged black man earlier that day I’m kinda wary.

The Alum Rock neighborhood is weird. This block looks like I passed the border to Mexico, the other is like I never left Westgate.

Moving on, the Alum Rock Branch Library. It definitely stands out from its surroundings.
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Like every library, it’s pretty awesome. The Children’s area is populated by cute little plastic palm trees and blue clouds.
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But I never linger there for long. I plop myself down on a comfortable couch in the quiet study room and start THE TRAVELER by Daren and Daniel Simkin.
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[[SPOILERS: The story is about a boy who wants to find out what he wants to spend all his time on. So he packs up his suitcase with hours and minutes and months and travels across the world until one day he comes home an old man and realizes he wants to spend his remaining time with the pretty girl he left at home. But when he opens the suitcase where he kept his time, only a measly month falls to the ground and several seconds trickle to his feet. And only now does it hit him. You cannot pack up time and save it. And so he lived the rest of his month with his friends and family. It wasn’t what he planned for, but he was happy. END SPOILERS:]]

The short story really resonated in me because, heck I’m pretty sure it’s what I’m doing right now!

Because the reason I’m going to all these libraries is because I don’t know what else to do. I’m searching for a reason right now.

Later, I tried to do homework but every sentence of SIDDHARTHA was a melodic harp that lulled me further to sleep.
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I have no dreams of late. It’s all black. A dark abyss. I’m searching for a star to look upon.

Finally, I decide I can do nothing more here and head out the door. It’s sunny outside. Good weather. The breeze is warm.

All that’s missing is… my bike.

My bike with the tattered basket and pink lock. Linh’s bike with the tired brakes and rusty chain. Where did it go? Who did it go to? A deep pool of anger surged within me but I tried to stay as calm as possible. My eyes radiated anger. I resorted to fast-walking to the nearest Alum Rock lightrail station approximately 0.8 miles from the library.

“The AUDACITY! The POMPOUSNESS! The THIEF!”

My mood today :<
My mood today :<

I screamed in my head that it was not so but Alum Rock is far from Cottle. The hour-long ride home leaves me exhausted and drained of anger. Now I'm just freakin' depressed. At the end of the day, I just don't care anymore. My legs ache. My feet hurt. I take off my flip flops and walk home barefoot the rest of the mile. Through grass, cement, pine leaves. It's the true hobbit experience you know.

It's like we're at the verge of Mirkwood Forest. The horses cannot go any further, nor can my bike help me. The band of dwarves and hobbit traveled great leagues on foot. Why can't I go a few miles?

Even without my bike, I'll still continue my journey. It's a duty to you readers and a duty to myself.

With that being said, tomorrow I am headed for Berryessa Branch Library! Fighting!

Seven Trees Branch Library

(BEWARE: this post is really depressing and boring. Stawp now and wait for the next update)

My eyes squint.
The sun rises high in the sky.
The wind blows humid waves.
I take off.

My back is still sore from yesterday. My skin burns. Today is a bad day for biking.

I dare not take any chances today.

The Seven Trees Library got remodeled a few years back. I remember when I was little and my parents took me to the small run-down library near the church.
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My favorite book series were Arthur and Bionicle.

10 years later, I’m taking myself to this place. Brand-new. I don’t run around like I used to. But I walk down the aisles slowly, like a passing leaf in the wind, extraneous to my surroundings.
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On my way here I was cussed by a driver, honked by a car, stopped by a red light, hit by the heat wave, and saw too many cars for my liking.

Although it is quite ironic of me, the truth is I’m afraid of cars.

Not being in them physically, but facing them. Biking next to them. Colliding with them.

It took me three hours, but I finished a book in the library called 24 Girls in 7 Days. It was about a smart boy who didn’t know how to talk to girls but needed a date to prom so his friends set him up with each of the 24 girls. In the end, he technically went alone. But he got over his fears of girls and even asked one out to eat.

I wonder, can I be like that?

I’ve hit a car before. The front wheel and bumper. No big deal. Only a scrape on my eyebrow.
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It might be that my fear of cars would be easily alleviated if I just fixed my brakes or bought a new bike and some protective gear, but even if I didn’t do that, one of the things I hope to gain out of this quest is to stop being so afraid.

I’m here to live so why am I so afraid to?

Life is green, why can’t I take a chance and go?

Someday I hope it will turn into a real smile.
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This post was a bit delayed huh? I guess I couldn’t put it to words until now.

Saturday morning, I will be heading to Santa Teresa Branch Library. Until then, I hope you all had a wonderful Independence Day celebration!

Down in the Dumps

You know when you’re feeling down? Just feelin like the most miserable person in the world?! Life is cruel and UGLY?!

So let’s start with a song~

No. I don’t have depression, but I want to talk about this from an outsider’s perspective here because I’ve never REALLY been in depression before. Everyone can be depressed at a certain point in time. But, most of us just get over with it and live. Others have to deal with more chronic depression and lemme tell ya:

Depression SUCKS. Literally. It sucks all the life out of you. It’s an inward battle between you and your introverted self and not everyone can fight. And win.

Depression can happen to anyone. Because of your circumstances, because you are you, it can happen. But, it’s also because you are YOU that makes all the difference. I guess it’s just a matter of your will whether you can get over your slump or not. It’s not as easy as it sounds.

If depression was a physical being, it’d be your evil shadow clone. And… that shadow clone by itself is a pretty tough opponent. But because depression is an internal conflict, it’s harder to get rid of than a clone. I guess like Naruto, at some point, you’re just going to have to fight and accept this ugly side of you. Because it’s you.

I’m not just gunna talk about the causes of depression or why it’s hard. What I want to talk about is what I think might help us all become happier, healthier, and better human beings.

My friend told me a very inspiring quote today from Epik High’s Tablo and I’ll quote him again for it:

“If your body is sick, turn to the doctor,

If your mind is sick, turn to the psychologist,

If your soul is sick, turn to music”

Music helps you relieve stress and when you hear music that really “clicks” to your emotions, it’s just that more meaningful and you feel less alone, because someone can relate to your feelings.

When music doesn’t help, turn to physical exercise! Take it all out on that stuffed pillow, that ugly little stain on your carpet! When I’m sad, I turn to cleaning as my punching bag. Usually, by the time that stain in the floor is cleaned off, the stain in my heart is pretty much gone from all the exhaustion too.

What I think is: depression is your evil twin. Whether it’s self-esteem issues or relationship problems or you just feeling down, I don’t think it’s right to just mope around in your little globe doing nothing but worrying the people around you. Instead, listen to music to forget it. Or jog, run, exercise, for heavens sake, WII BOXING.

Whatever it takes, when one is depressed, I think it’s best to just be relaxed and yet at the same time, try to be productive. Turn your negative energy into positive energy. ORRR Just find a negative person to be with you so you can BOTH TURN INTO PLUS SIGNS!! :

Bottom Line of the Day: Just be happy! Be happy you’re alive. Be happy you have food to eat, a house to live in, internet, people who care for you(hopefully you do), and a tomorrow to look forward to.